the calico blog

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6,482 notes

TERF:
we are here to abolish the genders
Feminist:
oh, so we won't use gendered pronouns anymore?
TERF:
no keep those
Feminist:
gendered clothing?
TERF:
no thats ok
Feminist:
segregated bathrooms?
TERF:
no those are important
Feminist:
so we're going to do something about the gender binary, yeah? We're going to attack the idea that gender is intrinsically linked to one's anatomy, and we're going to boost the visibility of trans and intersex people, who face the most violent consequences of the sex and gender binaries - yes?
TERF:
no
Feminist:
then what are you going to do, exactly? What is your plan? How are you going to accomplish this?
TERF:
abolish gender
Feminist:
How?
TERF:
abolish it

337,870 notes

How rape trials should go

Lawyer:
Did he rape her?
Witness:
Yes, but she was drunk and passed out.
Lawyer:
That's not what I asked. Did he rape her?
Witness:
Yes, but she was wearin-
Lawyer:
I didn't ask what she was wearing. Did he rape her?
Witness:
Yes, but-
Lawyer:
I didn't ask anything else. It's just a simple yes or no answer. Did he rape her?
Witness:
Yes.
Laywer:
Yes, he raped her.
Rape is rape is rape, no matter the context.

85 notes

burnsomesoulcoal asked: Thank you SO MUCH for answering my ask (and thank you to the rebloggers who have left feedback) regarding signs of abusive partners. I've heard things before like "he'll try to isolate you from your friends, guilt-trip you into staying," etc. but there's still all sorts of information that's hard for someone like me (a white cishet guy, and one who has never been in an abusive relationship) to sort out—hence my sending this page an ask. Most of the comments are basically saying that (1/4)

misandry-mermaid:

(cont’d) it’s (almost) impossible to see signs at all before being well into the relationship. So, are women who date men all basically walking into a minefield? ‘Cause if that’s the case, then that kind of risk sounds like dating men is hardly worth it. In my eyes all women are brave to still be dating men, seeing that a woman will never feel sure that every new man she gets acquainted with doesn’t have an inner abuser lurking inside him, waiting to come out well-into the relationship. (2/4)
(cont’d) I also understand why readers of my ask could think I am blaming the victim. There’s really no easy way to put my thoughts out there (thoughts that I’m sure contain biases, and conflicted/mis-information), so if they read like I am victim-blaming then that’s my doing something wrong on my part of communicating my thoughts, and I’m sorry, and I’m a work in progress trying to make sense of a dating world that doesn’t make sense to me. I also felt uneasy sending an ask that (3/4)
would be read by a big audience, but I figured my educating myself (and hopefully other men) meant more to me than staying in my safe little corner and not learning anything. If I’m made to confront biases that I didn’t realize I had (by people pointing out the biases), then I think that’s a step toward my becoming a better person. If any of the readers are interested in continuing this topic with me privately, they are more than welcome to do that too. Thanks for the book suggestion too! (4/4)
Thanks for your willingness to challenge your own abusive capabilities and for your strong desire to unlearn the toxic teachings you have been raised to be and believe as a man.  Definitely check out that book on abuse and remember how important the work you’re doing is, for not only yourself but every woman you encounter and are in relationship with in the future.

904 notes

sassy-gay-justice:

Too many men let other dudes get away with saying all kinds of sexist shit and scoff at the very idea of women speaking out against misogyny

but some of these same guys throw a fucking fit when a girl refers to herself as a misandrist or a “man-hater”.

Yeah okay.

(via misandry-mermaid)